‘Free Delivery over £75’ is not a f*cking special offer, online shops told

author avatar by 5 years ago

The world has united in disdain for online companies sending emails with ‘Special offer inside!’, only to find it contains a ‘free delivery when you spend over £75’ voucher inside.

The trend for positioning free delivery as a ‘special offer’ has grown of late as companies compete in ever more dubious ways to secure every last pound of your disposable income.

Online shopper Simon Williams told us, “I’ve been shopping online for years now, and I expect free delivery for anything over 50p, to be honest. Free delivery only when you spend over £75 is a slap in the face, never mind a ‘special offer’.

“The year is 2019. In November we’re all going to be eating out of bins, so do these idiots really think I’m going to add a few extra items I don’t want to my shopping basket just to avoid paying £3.99?”

“I would make a smock out of my old duvet cover before I paid for fucking delivery on some piece of shit I don’t need.

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“It’s slightly less infuriating than when you get lured into an online store by the promise of ‘Up to 60% off!’ only find that this discount applies to just one Christmas jumper that’s only available in XXL – and that everything else is fully priced.

“It’s almost as though the people running these online shops are all rich knobheads who have no idea what normal people do in their normal lives.

“Or, it could be that as a nation of consumers we’re just a bunch of fucking idiots who are all too eager to succumb to whatever misleading special offer businesses dein to throw at us.”