Tommy Robinson spends first night in prison, converts to Islam

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Muslim fundamentalists have radicalised former EDL leader Tommy Robinson after he spent his first night in prison.

Robinson was sentenced to 9 months in prison for contempt of court and breaking the terms of a previously suspended sentence, also for contempt of court.

Robinson’s staunch anti-Islam stance softened dramatically after a lengthy conversation with his cellmate Manzoor, who explained why his worldview had ‘a number of troubling aspects’.

His conversion to Islam was revealed at breakfast this morning when he greeted the kitchen staff with “As-Salaam-Alaikum”.

As prison guard who works at the facility explained the incident, telling us, “I’ve seen it many times, these radicals seek out the weak-minded, those with a feeble intellect, and before you know it they’re reciting the Koran all day long, calling themselves Mustafa, and growing a beard.

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“Tommy’s only got a day’s worth of stubble, but the beard has clearly started. It’ll be coming along nicely by the time he gets out in the autumn. Remember, you’re always much easier to convert if you’re a radical undamentalist before you get into prison.”

Prison authorities have expressed concerns about the speed with which Robinson was radicalised.

Governor Simon Williams told reporters, “Tommy Robinson was clearly radicalised before lights out last night. Yes, it was a surprise to some people, but others said he’d convert the moment there were no cameras around to promote him.

“The smart money was on him lasting at least a week before capitulating to the Islamic fundamentalists in here.

“I’m fifty quid down to Dave on C-Block, but I’ve gone double or quits on him choosing the name Muhamed Ali.”