Wednesday 26 June 2019 by Neil Tollfree

Boris reveals hobby of pretending to have hobbies


Boris Johnson paints buses for fun

Boris Johnson has used a television interview to reveal a very unusual hobby.

In his spare time, the most racist Foreign Secretary of the 21st century admitted that he enjoys pretending to have hobbies in an effort to convince people that he is normal.

“Well, I, Er, I make up hobbies,” he stammered, in response to a question about what he likes to do in his spare time.

“I go on current affairs programs and pretend to have hobbies, from quite normal ones, like painting, to really outlandish ones, like making model buses and painting the people inside those buses.”

He went on to explain that what he enjoyed most about his hobby was the challenge of seeing how bizarre the hobbies he makes up could get.

“Well, yes, with something like pretending that I paint, that’s plausible, many people have that as a hobby, so, it’s not really much of a challenge to convince people that’s what I do in my spare time.

“But trying to convince an interviewer and audience that I make model buses for fun? Out of old wooden crates and wine boxes? Well, that’s an enormous challenge and hugely satisfying to pull off. You have no idea the warm glow it gives me when I think about all those people who believe I actually do this stuff for real.”

He also confirmed that pretending to hobbies was, in fact, his only hobby and he’s never in his life made a bus.

“No, of course not, that would be absurd.”

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