Wednesday 5 June 2019 by Davywavy

Leading anti-vaxxer becomes Daemon Prince of Nurgle


Nurgle turns anti-vaxxer

Nurgle the plague-god is so pleased with the anti-vaxxer movement that one of their most vocal supporters has ascended to Daemonhood today.

Simon Williams, who ran a video blog called ‘Vaccines – the truth!’,  convinced thousands of parents not to give their children life-saving medical treatment and successfully damaged herd immunity to the extent there was a Polio outbreak.

Simon successfully spread a number of anti-vaccination stories – including that Orcs came into being as a result of the C’Tan trying to create a vaccine against Smallpox, Roboute Guilliman spent ten-thousand years in a coma after someone gave him the MMR jab, and Perturabo’s singular lack of social skills was as a result of ‘those weird chemicals they put in drugs these days’.

Simon also suggested that people could be protected from disease by their faith in the Emperor, because that worked out so well for the Death Guard.

“It’s not surprising that Simon should be rewarded in this way as Nurgle really likes it when people undermine medical science in favour of some woo-woo bullshit,” a statement from the Ordo Malleus told us.

“On that basis, we should shoot Gwyneth Paltrow now to save time. Have you seen the advice she gives on her website?

“Anyone saying you can make yourself healthier by sticking a jade egg up your fanny and washing out your arse with herbs is clearly in the service of Chaos.”

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