Thursday 30 May 2019 by Neil Tollfree

Westminster concern that Boris court action could lead to all politicians being forced to tell truth


MPs forced to tell the truth could cause problems

There was outrage in Westminster as Boris Johnson was set to face prosecution over the lies he told in the EU referendum campaign.

Politicians of all colours were concerned that any prosecution could lead to a precedent that compels politicians to tell the truth.

“It’s a ridiculous state of affairs,” said one politician who asked to remain anonymous.

“If politicians weren’t allowed to lie anymore then Prime Minister’s Questions would be silent, manifestos would just be blank pieces of paper and Newsnight would last about five minutes.”

There is another more practical concern that if all politicians were to be prosecuted for lying then the British legal system would have to be hugely expanded.

“The level of court activity that would be required to prosecute politicians for all the lies they tell would be phenomenal,” said one legal expert.

“We’d need more judges, courts, lawyers. We just couldn’t cope at the moment.”

However, it is not certain that the court action would be successful.

“Well, firstly, we’ll be arguing that he shouldn’t have to face the action at all as there is a long tradition of making fanciful claims in campaigns,” said Simon Williams, Boris Johnson’s lawyer and one of the most morally bankrupt people to ever walk the earth.

“Then we’ll be arguing that Mr Johnson can’t be guilty of misconduct in public office as he wasn’t holding public office at the time.”

Williams was then asked if he was prepared to make the argument in court that Boris didn’t actually lie.

“Good Lord, no,” laughed Mr Williams.

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