The EU election results have seen huge support for the Brexit party and – according to Nigel Farage – are a clear mandate for Nigel Farage going on the telly and shouting ‘Brexit’ a lot.
“For too long, the elites and the establishment have tried to say that I shouldn’t go on telly and shout ‘Brexit’ a lot,” said Mr Farage, whilst ducking several milkshakes.
“However, with over 30% of the popular vote going to the Brexit Party, I think that it is clear that what the people of Great Britain want is more of me going on telly and shouting ‘Brexit’ a lot.
“They will say that this election isn’t about me going on the telly and shouting ‘Brexit a lot, but I ask you – what else is the Brexit Party for, if not a vehicle for getting me on telly shouting ‘Brexit’ a lot?”
Supporters of the Brexit Party were in agreement.
“Well, yeah, alright, I suppose,” said Simon Williams, a Brexit Party Supporter who has nearly mastered two-syllable words.
“If that’s what I voted for then I must support it, because that’s what I voted for, isn’t it? I mean, I thought he might have a plan to make us do Brexit or something, but if it’s just about him going on telly then that’s alright.”
The BBC has already announced that tonight’s episode of Pointless has been cancelled to give over thirty minutes to Nigel Farage shouting ‘Brexit’ a lot, whilst experienced BBC news reporters, who really should know better, look on.