Theresa was a hardworking, admirable Prime Minister and as a personal friend I’m sad to see her go, says Tory MP who called for her hanging yesterday

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Local MP Simon Williams had paid tribute to Theresa May, whom he called: ‘The People’s Warrior,’ saying that it was sadly time to go, and she will be greatly missed, a day after spitting at her portrait in the Houses of Parliament.

He told reporters, ‘Tessa, as I’ve called her for years, has done a really sterling job, and took my jokes about her treasonous behaviour with good grace.

“She’s always had a sense of humour, and I know she’s taken no offence at all at me tweeting about her being a gormless twat that needed a swift trip to the gallows.

“All that stuff about traitors to the nation deserving prison sentences instead of close protection officers was just for shits and giggles, and thankfully she understood that.

“Anyway, I’m glad we can move on now, and finally get this Brexit thing sorted. It’ll be a piece of piss now, I bet. Boris definitely seems like the sort of person who can diplomatically sort out a constitutional crisis without any scandals or further delays. We’ve really shown the EU that they can’t mess us about.”

Theresa May commented, “Simon can go fuck himself. I’m voting Lib Dem from now on.’