Theresa May informs Tory Brexiters ‘Therexit means Therexit’

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Theresa May has told the executive of the 1922 Committee of Tory backbench MPs that ‘Therexit means Therexit’, adding ‘I don’t know why no-one understands what that means’.

The self-confessed ‘bloody difficult woman’, said, “I don’t know what these backbenchers are complaining about. They were happy to sit there smugly grinning when I bamboozled the British electorate by declaring ‘Brexit means Brexit’ so they clearly knew exactly what I was saying.

“Now, all of a sudden, I’m being ‘deliberately obstructive’, even though it’s exactly the same recursive definition I’ve used throughout the entirety of my shitshow of a leadership.

“Ahem, sorry, I mean, ‘my leadership’.

“I’ve even used this in my non-political life, telling my husband Philip things like ‘til death do us part means til death do us part’, ‘headache means headache’ and even, when discussing how people get by, ‘means means means’.”

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Tory backbencher, Lord Sir Simon Williams, said, “The whole thing is utterly baffling. Nebulous doesn’t even mean nebulous.”