Thursday 16 May 2019 by Lucas Wilde

“Oh fucking goody” says everyone


Boris Johnson leadership bid

Boris Johnson has announced he will stand for the leadership of the Conservative party, leading to everyone saying “oh fucking goody”.

The former Honey Monster hopes to swoop in following Theresa May’s planned resignation and take the Conservative party to new heights of utter depravity.

“Oh fucking goody,” confirmed voter, Simon Williams.

“Just when you thought the rollercoaster of British politics couldn’t get any more nauseating, we’re going to have a massive blonde child running the country. Fucktastic.

“This speaks volumes to the absolute state of the opposition as well, by the way. They’re not even going to be able to knock off someone who’s biggest claim to fame is being a bit of a twat.”

Boris Johnson commented “RUFF-RAHH!

“Jolly good, and I agree, oh fucking goody!

“Goody for me, goody for politics and goody for Britain and the queen!

“Get ready, Britain! Get ready to see the Johnson!”

Williams added “that’s going to be the poster, isn’t it? Yes, of course it is.”

There are currently witterings below - why not add your own?

Previous post:

Next post: