Wednesday 1 May 2019 by Davywavy

You should have gone to the toilet before we started, children tell parents watching Endgame


Avengers cinema

Annoyed children have told their fractious and unruly parents they should have gone to the toilet before we started, according to reports from cinemas today.

Parents, who after a few hours sitting quietly started talking about ‘needing to go’ and asking are we nearly there, have been told by their kids to keep quiet and cross their legs for a bit.

“They’ll be able to go when the journey is finished,” said Pippa Williams, 7.

“It’s only a few hours but you’d think it was all day. I suggested they play I-spy to see how many Heroes they could spot, but dad just said that was a stupid game and he was bursting.

“God, parents? Can’t they sit quietly for five minutes? I’m trying to concentrate.

“If they don’t behave I’ll have to send them home and finish this by myself.”

When asked, father of two Simon Williams told us “It’s all very well that my children asked if I’d had a wee before the film rolled and I said yes, but three hours is a long time and well, I’m over forty and I’ve got a prostate, you know?”

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