Fresh from cancelling his no-deal ferry contracts at a £50m cost to the taxpayer, Chris Grayling immediately has another brilliant idea.
Transport Secretary Chris Grayling has once again shown what a superb analytical mind he has by coming up with an innovative way to fund his ongoing Netflix subscription.
“I didn’t get where I am today without the ability to think laterally,” said Mr Grayling while tapping the side of his head.
“Negotiating ferry contracts with companies who own no ferries was merely the tip of my intellectual iceberg.
“Now that I’ve been stopped claiming Netflix on expenses I’ve had to work out another way to get it for free. All I had to do was sell my television for £7.99 and I can now get all that lovely content without opening my wallet.
“What? That’s only a month’s worth? In that case, I could probably have got two or three months for the price of a telly couldn’t I?
“Oh well, I’ll worry about next month closer to the time. I’m a firm believer in crossing bridges when I come to them – not bridges in the UK obviously because our transport infrastructure appears to be in a bit of a mess. Someone really ought to sort that out.
“Right then, where’s my telly gone?”
Mr Grayling’s wife Susan said, “For fuck’s sake! My friend has given me her password so we could get Netflix for free anyway.
“Now we can’t watch any TV and I’ll have to resort to talking to that twat.”