Redacted Mueller report shows Trump guilty of ████████ with ███████ and ████ ██ ███!

author avatar by 5 years ago

The long-anticipated Mueller report has finally been released, though the Attorney General has redacted the bit about Donald Trump ████ ██████ with the ██████ in the run-up to the 2016 presidential election.

The US Attorney General William Barr has defended President Trump over allegations of obstruction of justice, insisting that just because Trump was found to have ████ ██████ during the campaign, doesn’t mean he is guilty of collusion, and that a few cases of Trump  ██████ ██ with ███████ hardly amounts to obstruction of justice.

A particularly interesting section of the report shows that in the summer of 2016, Trump himself ████ ██████ ████ ██████, despite previously denying that was the case.

Barr went on, “There will be critics of the President who say that just because you ████ ██████ with a few ██████████ means you’re nothing but a criminal.  That is clearly not the case.  ████ ██████ is not an impeachable offence. Not in my opinion.

“I mean, who amongst us hasn’t ██████████ and ██████████ from time to time? If that makes someone a criminal, then the US prison system would be full!

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“Well, full-er.”

[This article was reviewed and edited by the NewsThump legal team]