New Star Wars trailer literally the most important thing in the world right now

author avatar by 5 years ago
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There’s probably some things happening in the news today but they aren’t that important, we can confirm.

Stuff which nobody much cares about include a bunch of political also-rans scoring points off each other, Nigel Farage being on telly to explain he wants to be on telly, and Julian Assange finally coming out of his bedroom.

If you aren’t a Star Wars fan you may as well leave not bother trying to discuss any of these things for a day or so, as it is unlikely anyone else is going to want to hear it.

Especially if you want to talk about politics.

Really. Give it a rest for, like, five minutes, eh?

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Islamic terrorist group ISIS responded to the trailer by describing it as the work of the decadent great Satan, but for once everyone was perfectly happy just to ignore their bullshit.

Meanwhile, in the United States, Donald Trump’s ongoing calamitous presidency was drowned out for a few happy, precious minutes.

Reports indicate that the world will still be here tomorrow and it’ll be pretty much the same as yesterday.

But today, Star Wars trailer.