The first candidate to replace Theresa May has been announced.
Lady Incognito is a little-know backbench MP for Springfield and sports an almost-comical moustache and glasses combo.
“I am here to offer strong and stable government,” declared Lady Incognito, in a voice and face that sounds and looks a lot like Theresa May’s.
“Mrs May is indeed competent, resilient, and fucking sexy. But if a replacement has to be found, then that replacement has to be me. I am the only one who can make Brexit happen to the degree of awfulness that has been promised.
“So, vote for Incognito, and let’s make December the end of May!”
Political commentator, Simon Williams, said, “…wait a minute, that’s the sort of clumsy attempt at humour I would typically associate with the Prime Minister..let’s have a closer look at that moustache.”
At which point, Lady Incognito attempted to quickly leave the room, but couldn’t work the door properly.