Parliament to be given vote between May’s terrible Brexit deal and catastrophe of no deal

author avatar by 4 years ago

Prime Minister Theresa May is presenting her Brexit deal to her cabinet colleagues before a parliamentary vote is scheduled on her negotiated terms, which will give MPs the choice between an awful deal, and an even worse one.

May told reporters that it was important that MPs are given the final decision on whether to accept her negotiated deal – or to leave the EU without one – so that she cannot be personally blamed for the inevitable shit-show that follows.

“The negotiations were extremely complex, but they went very well – in the end,” May told the press.

“But like any functioning democracy, the ultimate say on whether the nation accepts this negotiated deal will come down to our elected officials.

“Before March 2019, they will be given a free and democratic vote on whether to go with the truly awful deal I have negotiated – or to go instead with the even worse option of leaving without any deal whatsoever.

“It will be their choice entirely, they will choose which direction the country goes in, not me – and you should all remember that when the recriminations inevitably start some time in late March.”

Those voters who remain sceptical that Brexit will be good for the country have wondered if ‘Not leaving the EU’, might be an option when the parliamentary vote comes around.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” insisted May.

“Your options are very simply ‘in the shit’ or ‘something even more awful’ – ‘staying just as we are’ is never, ever going to be an option. The people have spoken, and as such our MPs must chuck us off a cliff, or push us into the fire.

“Suggesting there is any other option is frankly absurd.”

I think, therefore I am (not a Brexit supporter) – get the t-shirt here!