Satirical website discovers new way to stuff even more adverts onto the page

author avatar by 5 years ago

Popular satirical clickbait site FactPunch! has discovered some new and exciting methods to cram even more adverts onto their page, they have announced today.

Researchers at Kettering Pretend University made the breakthrough yesterday after inventing a technique to include more than one advert per pixel, literally doubling revenues.

The site will also stream video inside the gaps between letters such as ‘o’, ‘p’ and ‘d’, which they hope will really improve the user experience.

In order to push users to view more pages, a clickable ‘Read More’ arrow will now appear after every third word, meaning every article will take almost 40 minutes to read, but on the plus side will definitely result in increased turnover.

In a bid to expand reach, the site will introduce many more pages which will consist entirely of amusing pictures and memes scraped from Reddit.

With headlines like “Please God click on this!”, “You won’t believe the stunning results of clicking here!” and “If you don’t click on this I won’t be able to feed my family”, FactPunch hopes to generate enough advertising revenue to buy that beach condo in the Seychelles they’ve always wanted.