Your nuclear button just looks bigger because of your tiny hands, Trump told

author avatar by 6 years ago

President Trump’s claim that his nuclear button is ‘much bigger’ has been debunked after it emerged he just has tiny hands.

Trump took to Twitter overnight to brag about the size of his button, only for it to emerge that it’s of slightly below-average size but looks huge due to him having fingers like cocktail sausages.

”We’ve told the president that his button is the size of a dinner plate or a frisbee, but that was just to keep him happy,” says White House insider Billy-Simon Williams.

”With hands like his, something the size and colour of a Coca-Cola bottle cap looks huge and he doesn’t like to be challenged so this is just easier.

”In fact, the launch button isn’t even on his desk.

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”He just thinks a coke bottle top someone left there is the button and we felt it was safer not to tell him because whenever any of his staff gets arrested he bangs on it and shouts ‘Whoops, there goes Moscow!’”