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US President Donald Trump has insisted global warming is a hoax after a member of his support staff turned down the thermostat in his Mar-a-Lago suite.
With his holiday home feeling a few degrees colder than normal, Trump angrily took to Twitter to explain that global warming is a globalist conspiracy designed to take away money from hard-working American billionaires like himself and that he will do everything in his power to ensure those same billionaires get to keep all of their money.
“So much for global warming, today I had to put on a jumper INSIDER the house. Sad!” tweeted the president to his forty-five million followers.
“How can the world be getting warmer if I’m getting colder right here in my suite? Answer me that, science people!”
However, the president is seemingly ignoring the thousands of replies from those ‘science people’ explaining precisely what is happening around him.
White House officials have gone on to clarify the president’s comments, insisting US environmental policy absolutely is determined by however Donald Trump feels when he gets up in the morning.
An insider told us, “You think Trump’s commitment to return to the moon comes from some long-held admiration for the work done by our colleagues at NASA? Not even close.
“We just had a particularly clear night in Washington DC and he saw the big shiny thing in the sky and insisted that he wanted it.
“To be honest, there are many people here who still think he just wants to put his name on it.”
