Ranting man-child pretending the original Ocean’s Eleven meant something to him

author avatar by 6 years ago

Some bloke on the Internet is pissed off because some women will do a film now.

Simon Williams, 25, heard about the all-female cast of Ocean’s 8 and immediately went on an extended rant about how this would ruin the original George Clooney film, Ocean’s Eleven, which is a film that lots of people definitely cherish to the same degree as Ghostbusters.

“Women doing a film will definitely ruin the original,” frothed Williams.

Ocean’s Eleven was a great movie full of men doing manly things and it won’t be the same without George Clooney and Mark Wahlberg’s witty banter.

“…oh was it Matt Damon? Whatever. The point still stands and it’s my favourite film ever and women are less good so there.”

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Film producer, Jay Cooper, said “We are making a new film. We’re not going to storm your house and snap your DVD of Ocean’s Eleven in half.

“We did this one with women for a bit of a change as we’ve already done three Ocean films with men.

“Also, the original Ocean’s Eleven starred Fran Sinatra, not George Clooney. So fuck off.”