A violent Everton fan’s life ban from Goodison Park is a blessing in disguise, it has emerged.
After watching the Toffees latest defeat at home to Lyon, local lad Simon Williams laid into the Lyon players and brought his eight-year-old son along for backup.
Everton took immediate disciplinary action against Williams, leaving him free to support the other quality teams on Merseyside such as Liverpool and Tranmere Rovers.
Meanwhile, Everton boss Ronald Koeman has slammed the ban as “harshsh”, telling reporters, “Thish ban sheems a little unfair. Shimon wash the only guy on the pitch putting in any effort.”
FA Chairman Greg Clarke, said, “I think the ban sends out completely the wrong message.
“Everton is effectively saying ‘cause trouble inside our stadium and you won’t have to watch us struggle against the likes of Apollon Limassol on a damp Tuesday evening ever again’.
“This is supposed to be a punishment – they are actually doing him a massive favour.”
Experts now predict Everton’s next home defeat against Arsenal this coming Sunday to be marred by the sort of violence that typified the Balkans war.
Mr Williams added, “Thirty more years of not paying good money to watch that shite – I think I can handle that.”