by 
Prince Charles was left bitterly disappointed this morning on seeing the newspaper headline ‘The Demise of Monarch’, only to realise that the article to which it referred was about a budget airline.
It is understood that for one glorious moment the heir to the throne leaped out of his chair with delight at the prospect of finally getting his wrinkled hands on his mother’s crown, before reading with sadness the rest of the article about Monarch Airlines going into administration.
Prince Charles had hoped that by this point in his life he would have been merrily reigning over his kingdom, rather than sitting around and trying in vain to avoid watching Channel 4 documentaries about Princess Diana; a state of affairs which looks set to continue for the foreseeable future.
“Who calls an airline ‘Monarch’, in this day and age?” he was heard to grumble, aiming an ineffective kick at a passing servant.
“That is most unfair – don’t people take my potential feelings into account when they are naming these things? How is a chap supposed to run an eye over the paper without leaping to the wrong conclusion and almost giving oneself a heart attack?”
Resignedly he continued, “Ah well, winter is coming, as they say. Time to turn down the palace thermostat a little and hope for the best.”
