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Donald Trump and Kim Jong-Un have escalated their risible dick-waving contest today.
Trump, who is so insecure about the size of his dong that he has made impromptu speeches about how big it is, told reporters that he has an absolutely huge todger, far bigger than Kim’s, and a lot of people are saying that.
Meanwhile, Kim Jong-un, who is so fat he hasn’t seen his own penis without a mirror in over five years, responded by dancing around shouting that he has a massive – yes massive – wang and if he got it out – which he might still do – then you’d be terrified.
“We must be vigilant to prevent Kim Jong-un penetrating the US by the back door and lobbing in big ones from behind our backs,” said Trump in a speech that inadvertently said a lot more about him than his opponent.
Kim responded to Trump’s increase in pressure by threatening to whip it out at any moment, just you see if he won’t.
“I could, you know – just like that – and you’d all be shocked and amazed at how big it is,” he told senior party cadres to rapturous applause.
“The only reason I don’t is that I’m a kind a generous man who doesn’t want to shame others. Yes, that’s it.”
Much of the world is ambivalent about the ongoing conflict, with many people saying that if they want to watch unlikeable twats wave their dicks at each other there’s the lead up to the Mayweather/ McGregor fight for that.
