Wayne Rooney to recreate successful partnership with his original hair on return to Everton

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Wayne Rooney is hoping to reunite an old 1-2 with his original hair on his return to Everton, according to reports.

Rooney had a successful partnership with his hair whilst at the club, and attempts to create a similarly convincing arrangement since have been widely regarded as unsuccessful.

Rooney left much of his hair behind at the club where it has failed to make a mark, spending a lot of its time scattered behind the subs bench, stuck to upholstery in the physio’s room, and hanging around in the plughole of the team bath.

“After leaving Everton, Wayne tried playing his hair in a sweepover system for a while before changing to a short, aggressive style,” we were told.

“But it just failed to convince. Later attempts to transplant new talent to work with him just left serious gaps in his coverage up front.

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“I think everyone is delighted that Wayne is coming home to his hair, and we look forward to the two of them knocking long balls into the 18-yard-box and massage parlours of Liverpool for a long time to come.”