England U21s ready for seniors after perfecting the art of losing to Germany on penalties

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The England U21 squad have gained the valuable experience needed to lose on penalties to Germany, setting them up perfectly for a senior international career.

Having ended extra time 2-2, the penalty shootout was won with crippling inevitability by England’s greatest footballing rival Germany, which pundits have agreed was probably for the best, given what the future always holds for the young English squad.

Assistant coach Simon Williams told reporters, “What a great result for the team and for our country as a whole.

“We are getting better and better at losing on penalties, but to do so against Germany was terrific, and I’m so proud of everyone for making our highest hopes a reality.”

Crisp salesman Gary Lineker described the results as depressing but necessary, saying “The lads played brilliantly and gave it their all, but at the end of the day losing on penalties was probably the best for everyone involved.

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“These chaps will grow up, some will join the adult national squad, and they need to be fully emotionally prepared for losing on penalties to Germany on a regular basis, so this will stand them in good stead.

“With more results like this under their belt, who knows – they could end up losing on penalties to Germany in a World Cup final.

“But let’s not get ahead of ourselves.”