Identifying how much of a cunt someone is can be determined by how reasonable they make Piers Morgan look, according to new research.
After receiving praise for his handling of git-faced piss wizard Michael Gove and wank-minded shit hamper Tommy Robinson, researchers have concluded that Piers Morgan is a form of cunt barometer.
“If you watch a Piers Morgan interview and you’re on his side then the interviewee must be the very worst kind of cunt,” explained cuntologist Simon Williams.
“However, if you’re on the side of the interviewee then Piers Morgan is inevitably being a cunt.
“One thing is for sure, there’s always at least one cunt involved in a Piers Morgan interview.”