Fans of Millwall football club will be representing the UK at this year’s Eurovision Song Contest by performing a rousing rendition of ‘No-one Likes Us And We Don’t Care’ for the rest of Europe.
The horde of ‘performers’ will take the to stage en-mass and sing the song to the tune of Rod Stewart’s We Are Sailing live on television to reinforce the UK’s current position in Europe.
A spokesperson for the band told us, “Though there are essentially only four lines, we think the lyrics truly speak to a continent in the middle of Brexit with a message of hope from these wonderful isles of ours:
“No one likes us, no one likes us
“No one likes us, we don’t care!
“We are Brexit, super Brexit
“We are Brexit, from Britain!
“The only possible reason we won’t win the whole thing is if the European political elite choose to try and punish us for showing them how ridiculous the EU actually is.
“Brexit will be an incredible success for Britain, and just like this song, it is full of positives – if you’re British.
“Anyone who says different is lying and probably just wants to see Eurovision won by a transvestite rock band singing a lullaby in a language absolutely no-one important speaks.
“Is it any wonder we want to leave?”