CIA plotting to assassinate Kim Jong-Un by offering him full Trumpcare health cover

author avatar by 7 years ago

The CIA are plotting to kill the North Korean leader in the most dastardly and horrific way possible by offering him full Trumpcare medical treatment, it has emerged.

An anonymous source within the CIA told us, “We are forever trying to come up with inventive ways to assassinate enemies of the United States that don’t involve the exorbitant costs and high risk of sending in a team of Navy SEALs by helicopter to shoot them in the face.

“That worked with Bin Laden, but we only just managed to pull that off.”

Our source continued, “So now we are exploring different ways to assassinate troublesome individuals, and we reckon Trump’s scrapping of Obamacare may pave the way for us to try a different approach.

“The plan will be to wait until Kim Jong-Un contracts an illness, fly him over here and subject him to the best medical care that Trump health insurance can afford.

“The poor bastard won’t stand a chance.”

It is understood that the CIA are keeping the President on the golf course for as much time as possible, in the hope that an illness strikes the North Korean leader before Donald Trump starts jabbing at the nuclear launch codes out of sheer boredom.