Radio host Nigel Farage has warned that any life on Saturn’s ice-crusted moon Enceladus will pose a threat to the UK’s ‘Judeo-Christian culture’.
Mr Farage, who quit failing to become an MP in order to focus on failing to get a knighthood, insisted that lifeforms on the 500km-wide world are already planning to head to Britain in their droves.
Highlighting data from a graph he discovered on the Internet, Farage warned that their religious beliefs would be incompatible with British values.
“Saturn’s moon Muslims will have absolutely no interest in integrating with our communities,” he said.
“Before long, vast swathes of the UK will become no-go areas for hardworking British organisms.”
Ukip glove puppet Paul Nuttall backed Mr Farage and insisted that the ‘establishment media’ are denying the facts.
“Nigel is absolutely right to point out the obvious dangers associated with things he doesn’t understand,” he said.
“I know from my own experiences with the colonial marine unit on the exomoon LV-426 that aliens have no respect for our British way of life.”