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We’re offering one lucky reader the chance to win former Ukip leader Nigel Farage’s spunk-spangled Union Jack wank sock*.
When Nigel isn’t criticising Justin Welby, he can often be found bashing a bishop of a different kind, and the foot-shaped garment he uses to mop up his pompous nut butter could be yours!
The sock, which is lovingly encrusted with jingoistic jizz from Nigel’s nationalistic nutsack, is a symbol of the freedom, sovereignty and democracy that we already had.
The lucky winner could use it as a pen holder, vase or even a receptacle for the ashes of a loved one or family pet!
Maybe they could fire up their own patriotic plums and add their own populist porridge to Nigel’s flag-waving cock snot!
For your chance to win just answer the following question:
Name one tangible benefit of Brexit
Entries must be in by end of April 2019!
Next week: Win Donald Trump’s piss-soaked prostitute!
*Subject to availability, we hear he’s quite protective of them. Cash equivalent is 1c (in Euros).
