Confused man sending pancakes to the women he likes

author avatar by 6 years ago

A man who doesn’t really get Pancake Day is sending pancakes to women he finds attractive.

23-year-old office worker Simon Williams of Kettering spent yesterday afternoon decorating pancakes with hearts and ‘Guess who?!’ messages before stuffing them into envelopes and posting them first class to surprise and delight the objects of his affection today.

Williams, who has been single since they Year 9 end-of-year disco, said he could only imagine the delight on the faces of those receiving their pancakes in the post today.

He told us, “Nothing says ‘I love you, but I’m too afraid to say it in person’ more than a mixture of eggs, flour and milk fried for a couple of minutes and stuffed into an envelope with either sugar, lemon or Nutella.

“Women throughout this office building will be getting their surprises right about now; I can almost hear the squeals of delight – can’t you?”

Further investigation revealed that most packages had failed to make it to their destination due to Williams not using any packaging beyond the soon-soggy envelope.

However, Debbie Smith in HR told us, “Oh, that was Simon? Yeah, I got the Nutella one.

“I called security as I was pretty sure an irate customer was making a dirty protest.”