British satirical website NewsThump has been banned from the White House Press Pool after press secretary Sean Spicer accused them of pushing ‘false narratives’ and ‘fake news’.
Spicer cited examples such as reports that Voldemort had become the President’s Secretary of State and that he had signed an Executive Order to rescind the Ten Commandments.
“NewsThump is an enemy of the people, total fake news,” he told remaining reporters.
“Voldemort didn’t even make the shortlist, that is a total fabrication. As for the executive order on the ten commandments, that’s totally fake. It is nothing more than an exploratory working party reviewing the ten commandments, nothing else.
“We will be happy to return their credentials as soon as they start telling the truth, like how good a golfer the president is, or how great his hair is looking today. Is that too much to ask?”
When pushed by reporters from other organisations, Spicer was forced to admit that NewsThump had managed to publish one factual news item, and that plans to replace the constitution with the Ferengi Rules of Aquisition were now quite far advanced.