Brexiters call for an end to free movement of weather

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Leading members of the Brexit campaign have today called upon the Prime Minister to make ending the free movement of weather across Europe a major part of the government’s negotiations strategy for leaving the EU.

“Bloody foreigners, sending their filthy weather over here,” said Nigel Farage, ex-leader of UKIP and admirer of Donald Trump’s brand of restrained public speaking. before adding,

He added, “and those garlic eaters will soon find out that they can’t fool us just by making it white.”

Britain First spokesman Simon Williams, however, stated that while they were opposed to anything at all coming from Europe as a matter of principle, the fact that the weather was all-white had caused some confusion as to whether or not they should support it, again as a matter of principle.

“We love white things,” he said, “but we hate Europeans. It’s very confusing.”

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Ex-London Mayor Boris Johnson was unavailable for comment due to never having anything comprehensible to say.

Prime Minister Theresa May dismissed the calls, stating that she could not add the proposal to a strategy that doesn’t actually exist.

She added that the delays in triggering article 50 were due to the fact that she had only managed to read as far as article 7 so far.

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