NewsThump’s Guide to the Supreme Court Justices

author avatar by 7 years ago

Everything you need to know about the Supreme Court judges! One watches foreign films WITHOUT subtitles!

As the Supreme Court begin a legal hearing into whether Parliament’s consent is required before Brexit negotiations begin, we reveal the TRUTH about the eleven judges who will decide YOUR future!

Supreme Court President Lord Neuberger

The son of a German immigrant, Neuberger is clearly unsuitable to make a decision that requires the steel and determination of a true British patriot. His brother’s friend once shunned British electrical goods in favour of Swedish innovations.

Deputy President Lady Hale

Does a woman have the required attributes to reach the correct decision? Both her parents were teachers, which is a clear sign of blatant knowledge-knowing and biased left-wingery. She is married to a man whose surname is Farrand, which is of Anglo-Saxon origin but sounds a bit French. Sneaky!

Lord Mance

Mance counts languages amongst his recreations, meaning he may well speak foreign and watch films that aren’t in English. There is also a high probability that he does so WITHOUT subtitles!

Lord Sumption

Another speaker of foreign, Sumption speaks French and Italian fluently, and reads Spanish, Dutch, Portuguese, Catalan and Latin! All that foreign speaking could have pushed the Englishness out his brain.

Lord Hodge

As one of the Scotch, Hodge will be an anti-English racist. He will be willing to subvert justice in his sick desire to punish England for being superior.

Lord Kerr

Kerr comes from North Irishland, and he describes his religious affiliation as ‘private’. What is he trying to hide? Could he be one of the fifth column?

Lord Wilson

Wilson argued in favour of gay marriage, so crushing the dreams of your grandchildren and spitting on our culture will be like child’s play to him.

Lord Carnwath

Carnwath sings in the Bach Choir, who feature in the John Lewis advert about a black family that owns a dog. How can he possibly understand our culture and country?!

Lord Reed

Another Scotch, Reed will take great delight in ensuring that the English are denied the justice that, according to a recent survey, 100% of them demand.

Lord Clarke

With 51 years experience in British law, Clarke clearly knows too much about it. His mind will be too muddled with knowledge and facts to be able to focus on what is needed to make Britain great again.

Lord Hughes

Lord Hughes lists gardening amongst his hobbies in Who’s Who. It remains to be seen if he cares about the borders of his country as much he cares about the borders in his garden.