LibDem resurgence hailed after Tim Farron wins packet of Maltesers on a Tombola

author avatar by 7 years ago

The Liberal Democrats are back winning for Britain after Tim Farron scooped a stunning packet of Maltesers at a Christmas Fayre tombola yesterday.

Critics had written the party off, but the leader said this showed that a progressive, moderate party could and will win if they pull the right ticket out of a spinning wooden tub.

Polling had suggested the Conservatives would take the Maltesers by a comfortable margin, but experts were once again confounded as Farron romped home to clinch the tasty confectionary.

“This is a sign that the organisers of the Fayre want a LibDem victory, a Liberal future, and the Liberal Democrats back in government,” Farron told all eight cheering party members in his acceptance speech.

“It’s been a long, hard road to get the people of this fine country to trust us with a packet of Maltesers again, and I’m grateful to them for giving us this chance.

“We’ve started small here today, but we shall continue to grow and within a year it is my target to have won not one, not two, but three bottles of wine off the Hoop-la stall,” he said, before tearing the packet and spilling the sweets all over the floor.