Only two more England managers ’til Christmas, football fans told

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The start of December means that England will only have two more managers before Christmas day.

Even Manchester United fans are excited by the news, as two is a low enough number for most of them to count to and join in the excitement with everyone else.

Traditionally the festive season begins with a sharp frost, the first window being opened on an advent calendar, and a 4×4 with blacked-out windows carrying England’s second-to-last manager of the year arriving at FA headquarters to tell a press conference he’s in for the ‘long haul’.

“You know it’s about halfway through the year when England have had five managers,” FA chairman Simon Williams told us.

“And then you can really start the countdown.

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“If you haven’t started your Christmas shopping by the time the seventh person has been named the new great hope of English football, you’ve really left it too late,” he laughed.

“Don’t forget that Santa wears a red and white strip, just like England. And he travels almost as fast as our last manager heading out of the door.”

The FA have confirmed that they’ve made a list of potential future managers and counted it twice, and they’re really hoping they don’t get another naughty one this time.