Wednesday 9 November 2016 by Lucas Wilde

America gives Grand Piano to horse

America gives grand piano to a horse

America has given a grand piano to a horse and is expecting some quality tunes.

“I’m particularly looking forward to Beethoven’s Ninth,” beamed horse supporter and piano enthusiast, Jay Cooper.

“A horse has never been given a piano before because, frankly, the establishment wouldn’t allow it.

“Now, at last, change has come, and America will change for the better.

“There are a lot of doubters out there, and those doubters will soon be silenced by the graceful notes of Chopin, Mozart and maybe even Little Richard.”

Horse, Dobbin Williams, said, “I’m not really sure what’s expected of me here.

“I’m a horse. I am absolutely not qualified to play a piano.

“I mean… Look at these hooves and the way I am in general. I can’t even sit on the chair properly.

“Why on earth did anyone think this was a good idea?”

Cooper grinned, “We did it. We’ve made pianos great again.”

Democrat, Elizabeth King, said “We wanted to get a pianist of low-to-medium standard for the piano.

“She wouldn’t have thumped out anything exciting, but it would have been perfectly reasonable background music.

“But the people have spoken, and the people wanted a horse.

“God Bless America.”

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