Donald Trump attempts to grab Bono by the pussy

author avatar by 6 years ago

Donald Trump has congratulated U2’s Bono on being named Glamour’s “Woman of the Year” in the only way he knows how.

The steaming mess of a Presidential candidate approached the whinging little bastard of rock and grabbed him firmly by his assumed vagina.

“I heard about your award, I think it’s great,” said Trump, menacingly, shaking the rock star back and forth by his genitals.

“I never knew you were a woman. I’d heard you were Irish or something. I think it’s great. Just great.”

A visibly shaken Bono said, “that hurt quite a lot.

“I mean he held on for a good few seconds. Long enough to establish that there’s actually a cock and balls down there.

“Is this what being a woman in Western society actually means? It seems horrible. Why aren’t more people upset about it?

“I’d like to give back my award, I think. I don’t want to be a woman anymore.”

A spokesperson for Mr. Trump said, “Donald was just having a bit of locker room fun, or ‘sexual assault’ as you liberal elitist hippies insist on calling it.”