Battle of Hastings latest: You lost, get over it, Normans tell Anglo-Saxons

author avatar by 8 years ago

Supporters of the Norman-French army of William, the Duke of Normandy have told those loyal to Anglo-Saxon King Harold II to stop moaning and accept the outcome of the Battle of Hastings.

The victory for William’s Norman forces was absolute, though many Anglo-Saxons still refuse to accept the result.

“I get that the Normans won, but they lied in the run-up to the battle, and ever since they got that narrow victory the country has gone down the toilet,” explained Anglo-Saxon, Harold Matthews.

“Back in 1066 the country was on the brink of something amazing, we were leading the world in farming, barn construction and rudimentary milling.

“Yet here we are now 950 years later down to the fifth largest economy in world, behind one country that didn’t even exist 500 years ago.

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“That only happened because we let the Normans take over.”

However, Norman descendent Simon Williams told us, “Bloody hell, those Anglo-Saxons need to get over it, they lost fair and square. It wasn’t even close.

“It’s time to accept the result and shut up about it.  I doubt people will be moaning about Brexit in a thousand years.”

“Yes we bloody will,” added Harold.

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