Sam Allardyce considering move into banking industry

author avatar by 8 years ago

Disgraced Ex-England Boss Sam Allardyce could take up a high-level position in one of several banks, it has been revealed.

“Big Sam would make a terrific banker,” said a financial insider

“He is happy to bypass regulations set in place to prevent exploitation, he commands a vast salary despite no one really understanding what his job actually entails, and he’s hugely overweight.”

“He could walk into any job in the sector.”

Big Sam himself was said to be surprised by the offers that came in from the banking sector.

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“To be honest, I don’t really know a great deal about economics and finance markets and whatnot,” he said as he relaxed in his garden with a pint of gravy.

“But it turns out that you don’t really have to have qualifications or experience or anything, you just need to be a greedy bastard who enjoys a hefty lunch.”

“It’s like the position was created just for me.”

It isn’t just the banking industry that could prove tempting for Allardyce; retail magnate Phillip Green is understood to want to talk to him about a potential position administering pension funds for his companies.

However, it could be that Big Sam just stays where he is, because if there was ever a place for a grasping, corrupt fat bastard, then it’s the world of football.

Either that or politics.