My opinions are worth a lot more than £400,000, insists Allardyce

author avatar by 8 years ago

Sam Allardyce has denied being paid the ‘insultingly low’ sum of £400,000 for his frankly tremendous opinions today.

The famously modest and self-effacing Allardyce, who is accused of accepting cash to advise people on how to avoid transfer rules, denied the claims saying that the ‘thinks in my head’ are worth many millions of pounds and he’s insulted anyone thinks he’d work so cheap.

“I’m getting millions for managing the England team and that’s mates rates,” he told us in a statement.

“I’m that good at knowing football stuff it’s worth way more than what they’re saying I took,” he said which characteristic humility.

“If a dodgy Eastern syndicate wanted to know how to break the rules I’d charge them umpty-billion pounds before I said word one. Then I’d think only about it.

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“That’ll be ten grand for this statement,” he added.

Pundits have noted that if Allardyce leaves the England job he will leave with a 100% win record, making him the best coach the national team have ever had.