Tony Blair keeping fingers crossed

author avatar by 8 years ago

Tony Blair has his fingers crossed this morning, in the hope that Sir John Chilcot doesn’t even mention his role in the Iraq war.

The report into the Iraq war due at 11am, Tony Blair is spending the morning crossing everything and rubbing his lucky rabbit’s foot.

A source close to the Blair family told us, “Tony is still hopeful he won’t even appear in the report.

“You have to remember, there was a lot going on at the time, so Tony still thinks Sir John might just skip over his involvement completely.

“Sure, he had a lot of direct involvement in the deaths of lots of people, but 2.3 million words isn’t really very many at all, so he thinks Sir John will have had to leave out some of the details.

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“But is he worried about the report? No, of course not – you’ve forgotten that he’s now a Catholic, so after confessing his sins he’s been completely absolved of any wrong doing. All it took was a couple of Hail Marys.

“No, I’ve no idea why he chose Catholicism and its process of forgiving you for your sins no matter how completely horrific they might be.”