Saturday 2 July 2016 by Davywavy

Ronaldo already practising his excuses

Ronaldo pracising excuses

Ronaldo is already practising his excuses for losing to Wales, we can report.

Standing in front of a mirror, the Portuguese player is deciding whether to blame poor sportsmanship,  foul play or the sun being in his eyes for his forthcoming defeat.

The failure of little nations to know their place is also on the list.

We spoke to Wales captain Ashley William’s brother, Simon.

“Ronaldo has already been on the phone to the Wales coaching team to find out first where Wales is, and then the names of our players so he can practise making ill-tempered disrespectful comments about them.

“Apparently, he’s been scowling extra hard whilst saying ‘Robson-Kanu’, which bodes well.”

Ronaldo is well known for putting a great deal of preparation into being a poor loser, and has spent most of last night holding an insincere rictus smile in readiness for the post-match interview.

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