A shock investigation has shown that BBC presenters were still not wearing poppies in May; a full six months on from Remembrance Sunday.
“It’s as though the BBC just want to spit in the face of all the brave soldiers who fought for this country,” said Hettie Bottomdrawer, from Chelmsford, Essex.
The BBC faced criticism last November when it was thought that presenters started wearing poppies too early, or too late, or they were too big, or too small, or there wasn’t enough of them.
“Not having this sorted by now just proves that the BBC is entirely full to the brim with communists, homosexuals, and poltergeists,” continued a clearly furious Ms Bottomdrawer.
The investigation consisted of Ms Bottomdrawer watching the BBC whenever she remembered and shouting ‘They still haven’t got one on, look’ at her husband.
Ms Bottomdrawer called on the BBC to immediately make changes.
“I’ll tell you what I think they should do, I think they should staple poppies to all the presenters’ faces, make all their clothes out of poppies except their pants because that would be disrespectful, and do all filming from poppy shaped studios made out of poppies.
“Otherwise, they might as ruddy well just go and join Al-Queda and have done with it.”