Friday 3 June 2016 by Lucas Wilde

Brexiteers change their minds based on advice of powerful German

Merkel on Brexit

Former Brexit supporters have admitted they couldn’t help but be swayed by the arguments of German Chancellor, Angela Merkel.

The German chancellor made a heartfelt plea to little-Englanders everywhere in a speech that little-Englanders definitely didn’t watch while thinking “Hitler Hitler Hitler”.

“That broad was onto something,” said little-Englander, Simon Williams.

“I easily got over the fact that a German was barking orders at me despite the fact we won two world wars, and I found her message of strength in unity to be utterly absorbing.

“I’ll be voting ‘Remain’ on June 23rd with her dulcet tones ringing loud and true in my head, in the same way that Nigel Farage’s words used to rattle around in there, only in German and far more reasonable.”

Bremain campaigner, Jay Cooper, said, “There was never really any chance of anyone invoking the memory of WW2 once the German leader piped up.

“We’ve not seen anyone being so silly as to do that today and we definitely won’t be seeing any tedious memes or inappropriate cartoons over the next few days.

“Because Merkel weighing in was an absolutely brilliant idea.”

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