Thursday 19 May 2016 by Lucas Wilde

Minions file ‘cease and desist’ against Facebook users

Minions cease and desist facebook

The minions are fed up of your tedious minion memes.

The army of once-funny yellow creatures have sought legal counsel, in order to finally put an end to the thoroughly tedious practice of putting their image next to a thoroughly unfunny “joke” or thoroughly uninspiring inspirational quote.

“Enough of this shit,” squeaked 38-year-old minion, Simon Williams.

“We’re amusing side-characters from a popular film franchise, not props for your pathetic attempts to look interesting.

“I saw a photo of myself the other day next to the phrase ‘some people just need to be high-fived in the face with a chair’, which isn’t only a tired old gag, but it’s a level of physical assault that is thoroughly alien to me as an adorable children’s character.”

Tedious Facebook user, Elizabeth King, said “well, I still think those memes are funny.

“The other day I saw a minion meme that said ‘you don’t have to be mad to work here, but it helps’ and I damn near fell off my chair laughing.

“Those are the kind of hilarious things that get me through the day – well, that and the heroin, obviously.”

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