Sadiq Khan welcomes ISIS into his new London Caliphate

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Following the election of radical Islamist terrorist Sadiq Khan to London Mayor, it has been announced that ISIS will establish a London branch in Islington, just above the Red Lion.

The introduction of Sharia law will take a few more weeks to complete as the whips and axes need to be ordered from eBay.

“Allah Akbar,” said the new mayor dressed in combat fatigues and toting a Kalashnikov.

“Death to the Western suckers and infidels,” he concluded before setting fire to a Union Jack, stringing up an ISIS flag and firing his machine gun into the air.

It is understood that London will transition to a hard-line Islamist caliphate over the next twelve months with all pubs to be converted into mosques, all churches to be destroyed, and all fun to be outlawed.

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All of London’s famous parks will become the sites for executions and public punishments, and Khan together with his ISIS comrades are expected to immediately draft local residents into a standing army with a view to expanding the caliphate into Essex, Surrey and Hampshire.

Congratulations for Khan were received from the Taliban as radical Islamists the world over celebrate this important step towards a global caliphate

If only everyone had listened to Zac Goldsmith.