Everyone wondering how to get on Mary Cameron’s Christmas present list

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Everyone has claimed they would like to receive a Christmas present from Mary Cameron after it was revealed she likes writing £200,000 cheques as ‘gifts’.

“She sounds like a very nice lady,” said voter Simon Williams.

“So I’d very much like us to be friends. My birthday is next week, if she’s wondering.

“I love my own mother, obviously, but for £200k I’d be happy to start calling her ‘Mum’.

“Last year mine got me some handkerchiefs and a £10 Amazon voucher. She really needs to take a close look at Mary Cameron and up her game a bit.”

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Another voter whose recent parental gifts consisted of whatever was on sale at Argos, told us, “I was brought up to believe that putting money in a card is the most thoughtless gift you can give, normally given by people who can’t be arsed.

“But I’ve got to be honest, Mary Cameron is making me reconsider that view.

“She can give me as many thoughtless gifts as she wants.”