Experts predict that by 2020 only arseholes will be left

author avatar by 8 years ago

With much-loved musicians, actors and TV personalities dying off with increasing regularity, experts have predicted that by 2020 our screens, radios and newspapers will be inhabited entirely by odious cunts.

“David Bowie – dead.

“Alan Rickman – dead.

“Terry Wogan – dead.

“Rupert Murdoch -getting married,” lamented expert in arsehole longevity Dr Simon Williams.

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“It doesn’t seem fair that artists who’ve inspired creativity in millions of people and brought joy to the lives of millions more are no longer with us, yet Richard Littlejohn feels absolutely fine.

“Lemmy – dead.

“Glenn Frey – dead.

“Colin Vearncombe – dead.

“Phil Collins – making a comeback.

“I don’t think I need to go on.”