Every man in every book club in Britain is there for the sole purpose of getting laid.
A survey found that no man on earth is truly interested in any book not written by Tom Clancy, whose novels are rarely covered in book clubs due to being borderline unreadable.
“Yep, in it for the minge,” admitted desperate lowlife, Simon Williams.
“It’s really hard to pull in nightclubs these days as they’re so loud, and woman are suddenly wise enough to cover their drinks with their hands.
“But book clubs are brilliant. All I have to do is go and read a few online essays that other people have written, then firmly tell all these women that they’ve fundamentally misunderstood the core themes of Great Expectations.
“Then before you know it, they’re all over me like a Tom Clancy character over a terrorist incident.”
Innocent woman, Lisa Dennings, said “I just came here for an in-depth discussion of Don Quixote, to be honest.
“But most of the people here seem to be men in their forties, reeking of Old Spice and tapping their feet very rapidly. It’s quite odd.”