Canadian pop-star Justin Bieber is tragically ‘alive and well’ according to sources close to him this morning.
Bieber did not die peacefully at home yesterday, and continues to breathe the same air as the rest of us.
A spokesperson for Bieber’s management team told reporters, “We can confirm that Justin is still with us, and working on new material.
“He’ll take his shirt off in the video, which you’ll undoubtedly see when it’s retweeted by a billion teenage girls.”
Upon hearing the announcement about Justin Bieber, music fan Simon Williams told us, “This is such tragic news so soon after the death of David Bowie and Lemmy.
“It’s almost like God doesn’t want music to be any good anymore.
“He’ll probably let the members of Nickelback live to be 100, just you watch.”